Dear Child: Because Daddy Is a Police Officer

Dear Child,

Each day you wake with a smile on your face, ready to learn, laugh and love. You giggle as you walk down the stairs and watch Daddy pack his lunch and gather his gear. You wipe the sleep from your eyes and groggily kiss Daddy good-bye. You wrap your tiny arms around his neck and say “I love you. Be safe” as he walks out the door. You aren’t confused when you see me run to the front porch for ‘one more kiss’ because you’ve become so accustomed to this, that you don’t question it anymore. You stand at the doorway, waving fiercely, as he drives away.

Each night you wait eagerly for him to come home and tuck you into bed. You wonder why I pace the floors when Daddy is late and why I breathe a sigh of relief when the door finally opens. You say your prayers and ask God to ‘keep Daddy and all police officers safe. Help them make the right decisions and help them come home to their families.’

Each day you hear and speak the words, “Be Safe”, and yet your little innocent mind has no idea what it means or why we say it.

But you see little one, your Daddy is a police officer.

And for that, you should be proud. But our country is in turmoil and rather than radiating pride, Mommy and Daddy are often afraid because of the badge your Daddy wears.   Many people out there hate the police. They chant ugly words, spew disrespect and have no understanding of the stress that comes with the job. Even worse, an evil exists in the world. An evil that hunts the uniform like it’s a sport. An evil that spills blood simply for wearing the badge. An evil with no regard for human life.

Thankfully, you have no knowledge of this evil.

Up until now, we have been able to shield you from this horror. Up until now, you have been blissfully unaware of the dangers that surround your Daddy. You don’t know why he is always looking at his surroundings instead of watching your new trick at the park or why when we FaceTime him at work, he’s always looking over his shoulder instead of looking into your curious eyes. You don’t know why I cry when I watch the news, why there are days that I spend clutching the phone or why I run frantically when there is an unexpected knock at the door.

But I’m afraid little one, the day is coming where I won’t be able to protect you from this matter anymore. Some day you’ll hear hateful words about police officers; how police officers are corrupted pigs who kill Blacks simply because of the color of their skin. You’ll wonder if your Daddy is bad and you’ll ask me if Daddy hates black people too. You’ll look for the reassurance but the truth is, Daddy is cautious of everyone regardless of skin color.

Someday you’ll hear a news story about a police officer who made a poor decision. An officer who let his fear, his pride or his temper get the better of him. You’ll hear about police brutality, racism and profiling and wonder if your Daddy does those things too.   You’ll look for answers and all I will be able to tell you is that God and his police training guide Daddy and he does his best with the information provided to him. But sometimes, decisions are made in a matter of seconds and grace must be given to everyone, even police officers. Perfection does not come with the badge.

Someday you’ll hear about an officer dying in the line of duty. You’ll hear about the evil that took him from his family and see pictures plastered over the news. You’ll hear about the 21 gun salute and see his family mourn as ‘Taps” begins to play. You’ll have questions that I won’t be able to answer and you’ll look for reassurance that this surely won’t happen to our family.

And I won’t be able to give it to you.

Because your Daddy is a police officer.

My sweet child, there is evil in this world that I can no longer shield you from and it breaks my heart. As your mother I want nothing more than to protect you from fear, sadness, anxiety and evil. But as a police family, we must face this every day. Thankfully, we have those who stand beside us in uniform and those who stand behind us; family and friends who support the police regardless whether or not they wear the badge themselves.

We will show the world that we are stronger than those who desperately want to tear us down and that we will not stand by and let our fear override our pride. My dear child, good will overcome evil because you will be taught strength, honor, integrity and above all, faith.

Because your Daddy is a police officer.

Love,
Mommy