Dear Grandma,
I saw you today.
Well, not you. But I knew you were there.
It’s still hard to believe that you are gone.
It still hurts too.
I wasn’t expecting that; to still hurt. To still physically hurt. I think about you and it aches.
Its been three months since you left for your ‘vacation’. For three months I have been wanting to write to you… or about you… or for you. I don’t know which is a more accurate statement. Either way, I find it hard to do, because the ache makes it hard to type and even harder to think. And I know you wouldn’t want that. You’d want me to write something airy, funny, and with the words ‘shit and damn’ in it somewhere.
This evening I was driving home from work and I was thinking about you and what I wanted to say to you in this letter.
Within seconds I could feel the burn of tears in my eyes.
Shit.
Then I looked to my right and saw “you”.
Driving along side me was a large white truck with the name O’Donnell on the side, printed in green. Except instead of an apostrophe, there was a big ol’ shamrock.
I swear Kate…your blogging is so heartfelt! You make me laugh, cry and so glad to know you!!