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Note: I somehow screwed up the format of the blog when I copy and pasted the survey from rageagainsttheminivan.com. I tried fixing it several times, but to no avail. I even contemplated deleting the post entirely because I hated the ugly white background, but that just seemed silly.
Back when MySpace was cool (remember MySpace?) I used to love filling out these questionnaires. I convinced myself that other people cared about my favorite color, my first kiss, and what was the item closest to me that was the color red. But no one cared. Hell, I didn’t even care. But last year I completed a ‘year in review’ survey and actually enjoyed looking back on 2012 and reflecting and remembering what had happened in the course of those 12 months.
This year, I found this Q&A over at rageagainsttheminivan.com and thought I’d steal borrow her version for 2013…
1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?
I hit a ‘first’ in my career this year. I had to tell my patient that her test result revealed ‘ovarian cancer until proven otherwise.’ It was heart-wrenchingly difficult and I had anxiety for days leading up to our conversation.
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Oh dear… no. I tried to, really I did. I even tried making an easy resolution in 2013 for the sole purpose of being able to say that I kept a New Year’s resolution for once. My resolution was to try and send more cards, less texts/emails/facebook messages, for birthdays, anniversaries, births and condolences. But my New Year’s resolution began to slip sometime in mid-March.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Several people, myself included. We welcomed Alexander Thomas into the world in April, all 10 pounds 3 ounces of him.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Unfortunately, yes. For me, 2013 will forever be known as ‘the year of loss’. As the year came to a close I actually began to feel a little like an Angel of Darkness, because each month was met with another loss, more tears, and another goodbye. The months of August, September and October were the worst as each month brought a goodbye that I was unprepared for. In August, an old college friend passed away suddenly from meningitis, leaving behind his wife and three young children; and leaving us all stunned and facing our own mortality. On September 14th, we lost my Grandma Flo after her five year battle against Pulmonary Fibrosis. It still hurts. In October I comforted one of my dearest friends as she said good-bye to her mother and was left to pick up the pieces.
2013, with these memories, I am not terribly sad to see you go.
5. What countries did you visit?
Zip, Zero, Zilch. Not even Canada. How lame is that?
6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?
More balance between those things that I have to do and what I want to do
7. What dates from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 10th- welcoming our son into the world
September 14th- losing my Grandma Flo
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Breastfeeding. I nursed both of the girls for 6 months, almost to the day, and had planned to do the same with Alexander. However, here we are, almost nine months later and I am exceedingly proud of ‘how long I made it.” Breastfeeding, although a wonderful experience, can also be draining, especially for a working mom with two other young children. I’ll probably start weaning him soon, if I can get over my mommy guilt issue, but each day/week/month that passes, I grow more and more proud of myself.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Failing to live in the present more.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Thankfully no, but I was constantly nervous that my postpartum depression would return and my baby had eye surgery in June, which hurt Mommy more than expected.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Our new (and quite possibly our forever) home. We were crazy enough to put our home up for sale when I was six months pregnant, only to sell the home in 2 days without a place to go. Thankfully, we found a home we love, where we can watch our family grow.
12. Where did most of your money go?
Our new mortgage.
13. What did you get really excited about?
Having a boy. Everyone says they don’t care what gender they are having, as long as the baby is healthy… and that was entirely 100% true. But when I looked down at the (rather large) baby in my arms and heard my husband exclaim “It’s a boy! We have a boy!”… well, there aren’t enough words to explain my excitement. I felt like my heart would burst. We are incredibly blessed with our beautiful girls and now we are blessed with a beautiful boy. We get to enjoy both.
14. What song will always remind you of 2013?
Aside from the “Sophia the First” soundtrack, the only other song that comes to mind is Miley Cyrus’ “Wrecking Ball.”
Side note: I dont know which is more embarrassing, the fact that this is the only song I can think of, or the fact that I actually like it.
15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
– happier or sadder? About the same.
– thinner or fatter? Much, much thinner… but I was also six months pregnant at this time last year, so I think that may be cheating.
– richer or poorer? Poorer, one more kid and a lot more house will do that to you.
– thinner or fatter? Much, much thinner… but I was also six months pregnant at this time last year, so I think that may be cheating.
– richer or poorer? Poorer, one more kid and a lot more house will do that to you.
16. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Spend more quality time with my kids… and more quality time with myself. I think both are vital for my happiness.
17. What do you wish you’d done less of?
I wish I’d spent less time online. This is difficult for me, especially with smartphones, laptops, and desperately yearning for conversation that goes beyond, “mommy why do poofs stink” and “mommy can I go to a fairy school like Princess Sofia?”
18. How did you spend Christmas?
We did our family Christmas on Christmas Eve since my husband had to work on the 25th. Such is the life of a police family.
19. What was your favorite TV program?
Grey’s Anatomy. I’ve watched it from day #1… and I still get excited when I know about the medical conditions they discuss. I tried getting into “The Walking Dead” but it makes my anxiety skyrocket and I end up panicking about how I would save all of my children.
20. What were your favorite books of the year?
Fiction: Divergent
Non-fiction: Carry On, Warrior. (If Glennon and I were to meet in real life, I think we’d be besties… if 30-somethings used the term besties.)
21. What was your favorite music from this year?
Anything and everything that I could listen to without interruption.
22. What was your favorite film of the year?
I think the only new movies that I saw in 2013 were animated, but I did find Monsters University to be really entertaining.
23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned the big 3-0 in September. We had taken the kids to Kalahari for a mini-vacation with friends… but it wasn’t the birthday I had envisioned. I’m still bitter about it, but I think I sound like a huge brat when I talk about it. Perhaps one of my 2014 resolutions should be to ‘let things go.’
24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Like I mentioned before, I stole this from Kristen at rageagainsttheminivan.com, and I think her response to this question was exceptional… and so I am stealing her response as well:
I think that being more intentional with my friendships would have made my life more satisfying.
25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
This year was a wear-whatever-you-won’t-mind-getting-boogers-or-baby-puke-on kind of year. Maybe I’ll become more fashionable once my kids grow out of the ‘wipe bodily fluids on mommy’ stage.
26. What kept you sane?
Talking. Blogging. Talking. Reading. Talking some more.
27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013.
Relationships (not just marriages) take time, effort, compassion, and understanding. Be present in your relationships. Contrary to popular belief, being Facebook friends with someone does not make you ‘present’ in a relationship/friendship… it simply makes you an observer. Just because you know their child’s name, where they vacation, or what they had for dinner; does not make you a good friend. Furthermore, don’t assume that you will be able to reconnect ‘someday’ or convince yourself that now ‘just isn’t the right time.” Using the excuses; you both have so much going on/ live too far / haven’t spoken in awhile so it would be awkward; are just that- excuses. If you want to reconnect, then do it. Someday you might not get to.
2013… I am not extremely sad to see you go. You brought with you some wonderful blessings, but also much sadness. Last year, as 2012 came to an end, I challenged 2013 and declared “Bring it on, 2013. I’m ready for you!” Unfortunately I think 2013 may have won that challenge and I am entering 2014 feeling humbled. And so, 2014, I ask that you take it easy on me this year and I promise to do the same.
